The dark side of "Christianity" -- Part I

Disclaimer: I've decided to no longer avoid writing about sensitive issues... I'll have more to write about!

Every religion has its dark side.

For the second reading in morning prayer, we've been reading from a book titled Of Earth and Elders. It contains writings by First Nations people of America. Currently we're on an essay written by Floyd Red Crow Westerman. He's most famous and recognizable due to the role he played in "Dances With Wolves." He writes:

"I am a Dakota and my people have been living in the lower Minnesota area for centuries. ...Every state had a militia and the...order was to find and kill Indians who would not accept confinement on the concentration camp reservations...They confined all the people involved [in an uprising] in a stockade at Fort Snelling in the middle of winter... they marched them in freezing temperatures to Mankato and there are accounts of how white women poured boiling water on Dakota women and children as they went by and grabbed hold of babies and smashed them to death against walls. [does this remind you of a particular psalm?] ... It is interesting to note that it was church people who ordered a lot of this treachery, supposedly people of God. People of the church lead [sic] this type of assault on Indian people and that is one of the ironies that has been hidden in history. Today those people claim their righteous place with God when in a sense they were the early day facists. And, of course, concentration camp life has continued for us."

When I read or hear such stories, I flinch. It is a Christian heritage I am ashamed of. I've never been comfortable with the fact that my ancestors came to this land and claimed it as their own with little regard for the people who already lived here. Who did we think we were? Who do we continue to think we are? It's a sickness, a disease that has been passed down generation after generation. It's called ENTITLEMENT.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't one of the reasons the founders of this nation sought independence was so they could gain religious freedom? What about the native peoples' religious freedom? Oh...I get it. It was religious freedom for Christians only, not for other forms of spirituality.

Sigh. It's much easier and less painful to keep certain aspects of history a secret. Denial means not having to do something to correct the wrong done. And even though it wasn't done by my generation, I don't feel exonerated from the "war crimes" committed against the indiginous peoples of this land. I'm just as guilty when I continue to look the other way, ignore the conditions that persist this day for those living on reservations, and do nothing.

History in the Making

It's not everyday that someone gets to witness history in the making. I am still revelling in the excitement of it all...the investiture of the 26th Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church. And it was not your every day, run-of-the-mill type of investiture. But the investiture of the first ever WOMAN presiding bishop!

I was there at the National Cathedral in D.C. yesterday. Sitting about 10 rows back from the altar at the crossing on the south side. The entire service was indictative of her gentle pastoral, inclusive and reconciling presence.

To read her homily click here: http://www.episcopalchurch.org/78703_79214_ENG_HTM.htmHTM.htm

To see a video of the entire 2-hour investiture click here: Video of the Investiture Service, broadband (Windows Media 9)

In all one's senses, the service was most pleasing and engaging in beauty, holiness and the grace of the Spirit. But the most moving part for me was witnessing the two-plus hours after the service that the Most Rev. Katharine Jefferts Schori, the Episcopal church's 26th Presiding Bishop, stood at the baptismal fount and was available to any and all who wanted to greet her and/or receive a blessing. As wonderful as her homily was, words will never equal that simple and humble act -- a giving of presence and service imitative of Jesus.

I think I'll keep writing...

It's been almost six months since my last post. My life gets so busy that I have such little time available to be able to sit down and write. Over the past several months, I'd considered deleting this blog since I wasn't posting anymore. I just hadn't had time to get around to doing so! Then, last Wednesday I received a beautiful comment from someone who had stumbled onto this blog. I'd set things up so comments would be emailed to me. I haven't been to this site since the last time I posted. But I'm here now because of five little words of encouragment..."I hope you'll keep writing!"

:-)

Foreground and Background

I've been very critical of myself lately. I think I get in that spiral when I'm feeling overly criticized and start comparing myself to others who seem so much more whatever (fill in the blank) than I.

My general coping strategy is to withdraw into myself. Speak little. I'm working hard this week to remain present in the community. Not just physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. But the self-judging continues in the background of my life. ("you're a downer." "you're immature." "you don't deserve..." "of course she is liked better than you. She is... and you aren't... She does all this...")

I hate times like these. It clouds all the good things that are going on in my life in the foreground. For example, our program this past weekend was a huge success! I received over-all good general feed-back about the food presentations I did on Saturday. And the participants all mentioned during the wrap-up session of desires to change the way they've been relating and viewing food and their food choices. And I'm hopeful about the future and future programs!

Evangelical Marketing

First, here's an update...
The cast came off yesterday! yea!
I'm in a walking boot and start P.T. today. oooowwwww!

Disclaimer: If you are fundamental/evangelical, this post is not about you personally. I grew up in a strong fundament/evangelical setting. This post is about me waking up and seeing how empty this form of faith left me, and coming to know God out of any box humans use in order to define, explain (etc.) God. It's about expressions in which I find a god to be biased, judgmental, exclusionary, patriarchal, etc. An expression where I do not experience love and compassion and unity. It's about me shedding old skin and putting on more inclusive, compassionate, non-patriarchal, non-heirarchal expressions of God.

I'm going through a major transition as far as my spiritual life is concerned. There are things about the fundamental/evangelical side of christianity that really bother me.

I asked one of the sisters, "How can you stay a christian with the basic tenets loudly professed by the religious Right?"

She responded, "Who says they are the ones that get to define what christianity is and how it is expressed?"

Good point.

The latest roo-ha-ha by the Christian Right is over the DaVinci Code movie. Did you hear the one about director Ron Howard making the movie in order to subvert christianity?

Pleeeease! My response to that: "I suppose he made the movie because he knew Americans were enthralled with the story and it would bring a nice profit at the box office! I do not think he is a pawn of Satan."

Oh...And here's a bit of interesting information: LITTLETON, Colo. : "Evangelical churches across the nation are launching an aggressive effort to save souls by talking about a fictional murder mystery that many regard as blasphemous. Pastors are setting out doughnuts and sandwiches and inviting non-Christians to come discuss "The Da Vinci Code" bestseller. They're creating hip marketing campaigns to draw nonbelievers to sermons about the thriller. They're even giving away free iPods loaded with their commentary on the novel."

Am I the only one who sees something wrong with using "marketing campaigns" in the name of God and encouraging and supporting American Corporations and spending habits?

These things make me roll my eyes, grimace and sigh all at the same time.

Did you know there's a mega-church in Dallas that advertises one of its ministries as The Bomb Squad? It "consists of teenagers on a mission of warfare against the strongholds of Satan against all youth. The Bomb Squad Mission sends them to Malls and neighborhoods dropping the BOMB of the WORD of GOD to all who will hear and receive. After the bomb is dropped, they are off to the next Mission."

This morning during our Bible (Wisdom) Study.
One of the sisters said: "Since when does God need us to do all this defending?"
Finally, there's a sane thought.
(i.e. as if the DaVinci Code is really somehow a threat to God's existence?)

I wonder sometimes if anyone who is on that "war path" for God has stopped to look outside themselves and see the presence God in all -- especially in the created world. I personally don't find God in haggling over a book and movie and receiving a free iPod.

What do mega-churches and corporations have in common?

Advertising.

OK...this is the end of my rant against the insanity of some sects of christianity. (Yes, my judgment and opinion)
I don't buy into it anymore. Though I admit, I once did!
I moved out of TX, I've aged, my faith is maturing. Fundamental/Evangelicals would say I've strayed. Everyone's entitled their own opinions.

When the Body Can No Longer Support Life

There were two deaths of persons either close to the community or close to one of the sisters last week. Two funerals to attend this week, one on Wednesday the other on Thursday. Then to top this off, one of our sisters found out 3 weeks later about the passing of her god-father.

The death of someone close to us, seems to bring into our conscious awareness our own fragile existence and impermanence.

In Dallas I took an apologetics and a pastoral care class under Will Spong (the brother of the former Bp. of Newark, NJ -- Bp. John Shelby Spong)

Will was also a priest. Like Andrew he lived under the shadow of his more famous brother. But he was an amazing man. Will's Bio

I don't remember which class it was, but in one of the two classes Will asked us: "What caused Jesus' death?" Answers flew around the room: "He was a threat to the established order. In a way he caused his own death by the choices he made." "He was setup by the chief priests, the Jews, Pilot and sentenced to crucifixion." "Being crucified."

None of these answers satisfied Will and he pressed us further.

Finally I said, "He died from asphyxiation."

BINGO! That was the answer he was looking for, the specific cause of death.

Asphyxiation was the eventual cause of death for someone hanging on a cross. It's a slow death. When your arms are outstretched and over your head, your lungs are unable to function properly. (If you'd like to try it, see how long you can hold your arms outstretched and slightly above your head. In five minutes or less you'll be agony.) That's why they nailed the feet or put them on a platform. The instinct to live caused the crucified to push up so they could breathe again. Talk about cruel. Sometimes they could live for days until their strength finally gave out and they could no longer push themselves up, and they suffocated.

But I've strayed from my original reason for writing this post. There was something I got from that course that will be with me the rest of my life. It is what finally helped me get over my fears of death (whether my own or someone close to me).

Will told us: "Death is what happens when the body can no longer support life."

It was such a revelation in my life. This was the first time I'd ever heard someone talk about death as something other than "an ending to/of life." Talk about finding comfort in that! When my mother died from cancer later the year, Will's words helped me be with her, and totally present to her, and comfort her through her last week.

Also one of Will's favorite quotes was from the great novelist, Nikos Kazantzakis—his novel Zorba the Greek—

’Life is what you do when you’re waiting to die,’

I make no claims as to what happens to life after that moment. I do not profess to know with certainty. But this I do know...

I'm doing life while waiting to die. And I find comfort in understanding that when death comes it will not be an end of life, it will only be my body no longer able to sustain my life.

Judged

I've been judged; and over and again, each day, I am found to be lacking in one way or another.